智慧书

序号 标题 中文 英文
257257257.慎于断交
慎于断交,否则你的名誉受损。任何人都可能成为致命的敌人,但不是所有的人都能成为一个益友。很少有人能做善事,但几乎人人都能做恶。与甲虫决裂后,鹰即使在朱庇特怀里筑巢都感到危机四伏①。说话太直率会激怒一些虚伪的人,他们会等待时机报复你。你冒犯的朋友会成为你最棘手的敌人:他们喜爱自己的过失,却对你的过失耿耿于怀。当别人看到我们和朋友分道扬镳时,他们会随心所欲地乱加评论,他们会批评说这段友谊一开始就不对头(说我们没有远见),结局也不怎么样(说不应该将就了这么久才分手)。当你觉得必须和某人断交时,要做到好聚好散,合情合理,不要突然断交,而应该渐渐地减少情分,这时有关如何明智地退出的箴言②便很有帮助。
①参见《伊索寓言》。
②见弟38则格言。
257 Never let Matters come to a Rupture,
for our reputation always comes injured out of the encounter. Everyone may be of importance as an enemy if not as a friend. Few can do us good, almost any can do us harm. In Jove’s bosom itself even his eagle never nestles securely from the day he has quarrelled with a beetle. Hidden foes use the paw of the declared enemy to stir up the fire, and meanwhile they lie in ambush for such an occasion. Friends provoked become the bitterest of enemies. They cover their own failings with the faults of others. Everyone speaks as things seem to him, and things seem as he wishes them to appear. All blame us at the beginning for want of foresight, at the end for lack of patience, at all times for imprudence. If, however, a breach is inevitable, let it be rather excused as a slackening of friendship than by an outburst of wrath: here is a good application of the saying about a good retreat.
258258258.找人帮着分担自己的不幸
找人帮着分担自己的不幸,这样,你才不会孤独。即使在很危险的情况下,也不必被迫承受其他人的全部憎恶。有人想对一切负责,结果只能是所有的批评都指向他。所以应该找个可以原谅你且愿意帮你分担困难的人。两人并肩,恶运和暴民都不太敢冒然来攻。医生也许会有诊断错误,他明智的作法是征询其他医生,问是否能帮他抬棺材。他们一起分担棺材的重量及哀伤。独自承担不幸,不幸会变得加倍难挨。
258 Find out someone to share your Troubles.
You will never be all alone, even in dangers, nor bear all the burden of hate. Some think by their high position to carry off the whole glory of success, and have to bear the whole humiliation of defeat. In this way they have none to excuse them, none to share the blame. Neither fate nor the mob are so bold against two. Hence the wise physician, if he has failed to cure, looks out for someone who, under the name of a consultation, may help him carry out the corpse. Share weight and woe, for misfortune falls with double force on him that stands alone.
259259259.预见侮辱,并将其转为有利条件
避开侮辱要比报复明智。将潜在的敌人转化为密友是个高超的技巧。本来会攻击你名誉的人变成了你名誉的保护者。懂得如何让别人对你感恩,把原本会受到的侮辱转化为感激是很有益的。学会把苦转化为乐,你才算真正懂得了如何生活。让怀有恶意的人转变成为你的知己吧。
259 Anticipate Injuries and turn them into Favours.
It is wiser to avoid than to revenge them. It is an uncommon piece of shrewdness to change a rival into a confidant, or transform into guards of honour those who were aiming attacks at us. It helps much to know how to oblige, for he leaves no time for injuries that fills it up with gratitude. That is true savoir faire to turn anxieties into pleasures. Try and make a confidential relation out of ill will itself.
260260260.你不能完全属于别人,也没有人能完全属于你
亲情不能如此,友谊甚至最大程度上的感恩也不能如此,因为你很难把心交给一个人。最亲密的结合也有隔阂的地方。不管你和一个人如何亲密,仍然需要遵守礼貌的原则。我们对朋友隐瞒这样或那样的秘密,儿子甚至不会向他的父亲坦白一切。你对某些人隐瞒的事也许会告诉另外一些人,反之也是如此。所以说你坦白了一切也同时隐瞒了一切,只是针对不同的人而已
260 We belong to none and none to us, entirely.
Neither relationship nor friendship nor the most intimate connection is sufficient to effect this. To give one’s whole confidence is quite different from giving one’s regard. The closest intimacy has its exceptions, without which the laws of friendship would be broken. The friend always keeps one secret to himself, and even the son always hides something from his father. Some things are kept from one that are revealed to another and vice vers?. In this way one reveals all and conceals all, by making a distinction among the persons with whom we are connected.
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